Какая ночь! Я не могу and Не гляди на меня с упрёком: These songs were playing on repeat as I wrote this poem. I used to write like this quite often—from an emotion or thought evoked by a song—and I wanted to see if I could still do it. So the poem is largely inspired by the original poems, used as lyrics here, but from the perspective of a woman.
PS: I've always admired how direct and emotionally unflinching Sergey Yesenin's poetry is. It's all the more haunting knowing that he died not long after writing these... or how the end of his life played out... or how he wrote his last poem... truly... overwhelmingly tragic.
Also, Denise gives us the prompt words and hosts the Six Sentence Story hops weekly... all the six-sentence entries of this week can be found at this link-up.
I also linked this entry up at the dVerse Open Link Night and you can find many super talented poets at their link-up. Checking 'em out... ummm... their poetry I mean... is one of my favourite pastimes.
Yarn
Pirouetting in the comforting trance
of the words written by a poet long gone,
I imagined myself in a white knit-lace dress
adorned with pink crocheted peonies—
brushing against my ankles as I sway.
Gliding across the waterline,
as the foam from the sea tickles my feet,
you open up your arms and we melt into one another
as my rosy cheeks and velvet-red, wine-stained lips
get buried in the nook of your neck.
Sandalwood, saffron, cinnamon, and vanilla.
A piece of yarn from the hem of my dress,
tied around your finger, unraveling with every twirl—
our bodies pulling closer,
entangled, inseparable...
swaying as one.
And by the end of the song—
tired and winded—
we collapse into the sand...
my naked husk... resting... safe and sound...
in the arms of home; and for once...
belonging.
But... I am here... spending my nights in the embrace of another—
a rather beautiful face he has... but his hands...
they never felt quite right...
and perhaps that is why I find myself closing my eyes...
eager to return to the song...
swaying.
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37 Comments
An evocative piece that handles the contrast between romantic fantasy and unfulfilling reality with great precision 🙌
Thank you so-so much!
I think sometimes when faced with liminal memory and real life, the fantasy becomes more nourishing to the creative soul. So indulge, refresh, and then thump back into the present to create something to be shared with others?
I guess it is kinda true about the writer/creative mind thing…
Thank you!
A gorgeous piece of poetry, Reelika. Desire, passion, dreaming of the ideal love and its promise of fulfillment. Artful use of the prompt word (4th and 5th stanzas),
“A piece of yarn from the hem of my dress, tied around your finger, unraveling with every twirl—”
“… we collapse into the sand…my naked husk… resting… safe and sound…”
P.S. I listened to both songs and while I liked both, my favorite was the first one. I can understand why you had both on repeat. It’s a special state to write in when there’s a song you’re compelled to listen to over and over until a piece is finished. Melding with the music, music as muse, complete.
Thank you so much for the kind words, the first one is truly beautiful… And there is something about getting inspiration from music or other artists that is so cool.
That’s a wonderful piece, Reelika. More than delightful…
Awww. Thank you!
Your yarn poem has all kinds of appeal to the senses: the knit-lace dress brushing against ankles; the foam tickling feet; the scents of sandalwood, saffron, cinnamon, and vanilla. I enjoyed the romance of this poem, Reelika.
Thank you so much, am happy you noticed…
It was something I was trying to do with this one.
A very nice and evocative poem 👍 Nice job!
Thank you so much!
I love the smells here: Sandalwood, saffron, cinnamon, and vanilla. The ending though feels dreamy yet a shock of realism. Thanks for linking up with dVerse.
Thank you so much for the comment and I love dVerse!
Also those smells… Every scent in my home has one of these… I have vanilla around every corner, always… And the room spray is always wood and spice… But I also love candles…
Nice line: “a rather beautiful face he has… but his hands…” For all his beauty it wasn’t like being home.
Thank you, and it is… in my opinion that is… the most beautiful phenomena…
when a home is no longer a place, a country…
but people.
The title didn’t have me thinking romance but then when I started reading the poem I followed that yarn in to a wonderful journey – great writing!
Thank you so much!
A beautiful poem, and yes, sometimes it’s not quite right, so you close your eyes in many things.
Thank you!
I don’t have much to add to what has already been said above. Great write Reelika 👏
Thank you so much. Glad you liked it!
It’s quite intimate and melancholic in the same breath: reaching for something out of reach only for it to unravel at first touch <3
Thank you so much for the comment!
Unravelling is such a great metaphor, Reelika and it reminded me of two songs by Dory Previn (who, if you don’t know her, I think you might like), The Comedian and more similarly romantic, Atlantis… https://open.spotify.com/track/6ucoVwmhqqttqwOiz1nnkg?si=624d3336c7834d71
This is very lovely: Evocative sensory contrasts between the warm scents of spices (sandalwood, saffron, cinnamon) and the cool sea foam. And the yarn metaphor has the physical anchor that brings people together. And then the pivot from romantic fantasy to stark reality lands with an impact.
Thank you so much for that comment, I was so hopeful that I managed to make it land… Even if it was stark.
Oh my, this is wonderful. Reelika
Aww. Thank you so much!
what a lovely sultry romantic yarn, until of course the end. it’s so true though, if the touch isn’t right it doesn’t matter how pretty the face
Thank you so much.
Beautiful written 💜
Thank you!
A piece of yarn from the hem of my dress,
tied around your finger, unraveling with every twirl—
our bodies pulling closer,
entangled, inseparable…
swaying as one.
Great lines Reelika! Most touching especially when it encompassed references to the poet who had passed on. It rekindled memories that sustained!
Thank you so-so much!!! Am glad you liked it and thought that way about the poet that moved on.
Nicely done. I like your ending lines!
Thank you very much, I changed the ending around 50 times until the very end… Am glad you liked it.
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