Six-Sentence Story – the Key

Excerpt from the six-sentence story

So, this is  my third piece of a six-sentence story in this hop. Enjoy – the Key, a story of a young boy fallen for a girl that can not see her worth. I really liked this weeks prompt word. This story, a fiction also thrives from real life and the people I have known. Our poor boy is so in love with a girl, that couldn’t love herself. Such a painful lesson, to give things some time. Perhaps he shouldn’t have given up? Who knows. perhaps life would be different. You will never know.

the prompt was created by our wonderful girlieontheedge

Rules of the hop:
Write 6 Sentences. No more. No less.
Use the current week’s prompt word.

PROMPT WORD:  KEY

Others’ stories can be read here.

Loving her… the Key – a Six-Sentence story

It was as if he was venturing into the halls of an old abandoned building and as he stood there on the door frame, clutching a key in his sweaty palms, he couldn’t help but be perplexed at the fact that anyone could ever show such neglect to something so majestic.

It was as if her skin was a canvas for the scribbles of the people who used to live there and as he was tracing his fingers on the scars he felt the need to protect the beauty and knowledge that they withheld. 

Yes, even if her halls were empty and void of life, she was beautiful to him, such a miracle of existence that he wanted to hold her in his arms, away from the cruelty of being alive, as the key in his palm burned into his skin. 

He didn’t know any other way to show his admiration than to shower the curtains with kisses or be amazed by every corner in the room – the love he felt tasted sweeter than the agave syrup he was used to putting into his coffee.

But he couldn’t even hold her in the morning before hearing her muttering: “Please, leave”, and with that, he felt the daggers that people used to leave marks on others push into his flesh.

And the key he held on so tightly tumbled from his hand down the stairs and it felt as if the rustic door to the paradise he had been dreaming of had shut forever.

Thank you for reading my six-sentence story the key. Take Care!

Shameless Self-Promo

My whole collection, as a book, yes. Can be found here.

And my first ever Poetry book no. I : Act I and Act II

Follow me on Spotify here.

And you may subscribe to my YouTube channel as I am slowly adding lyric videos there.

 

5 2 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
27 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Frank Hubeny
7 months ago

Words can leave wounds and even heal. Nice description of the key falling down the stairs.

Matt D
7 months ago

Felt like I was right there in the story. Great Six.

Doug Jacquier
7 months ago

What an original take on unrequited love. Bravo.

messymimi
messymimi
7 months ago

Some people are just hurt too badly to try again.

Spira
7 months ago

Beautifully, achingly, haunting…as it is often when stardust and beasts collide.

Keith's Ramblings
7 months ago

An inspired take on the prompt word. A sorrowful tale skillfully told.

clark
7 months ago

Yow!*
All too true, yet to recognize such interactions as others experience it (or similar found and lost opportunities), somehow helps becomes more positive than negative.
Thoughtful Six.

*compliment on an engaging and almost tactile Six

Chris
7 months ago

Splendid imagery! A well-crafted Six.

Paul
7 months ago

words can wound, good job with the use of the key

Greg G
7 months ago

Great six and use of the ‘key’ word.

The Atomic Mage
7 months ago

Enjoyed this haunting and beautiful gothic tale. Love the name of your blog too!
Ford

GirlieOnTheEdge
7 months ago

Such sadness and hope in the very first line. The metaphor of a building (I imagine an old Victorian style house) is perfect for the complexity of the apparent relationship – craftsman in love with a thing of beauty, damaged by time and elements.
P.S. Read your intro. I’m glad you are enjoying SSS and…thank you.

Liz H-H
7 months ago

A great take on the idea that Home is where the heart is.
He had the key, but lost it, sadly. Splendid Six!

27
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x